What a Mother Should Do

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As a mother, I sometimes feel immense pressure—some from society, but mostly from myself—to raise kids that turn out “right.” With that pressure comes a laundry list of “should”

• I should feed them “healthy” food all the time
• I should make sure they have plenty of free time to play and explore outside
• I should enroll them in the best activities, so they learn the right skills.
• I should assign them chores to work for money.
• I should give them an allowance.
• Family devotions should happen every day
• I should keep them on a set routine
• I should keep a clean house
• I should let the house and routines go to live in the moment
• I should tuck my children in with stories, a prayer, and a kiss every night
• I should send the kiddos to bed early so I can have time alone so I am my “best self.”

As you can see and have probably noticed in your own life, the “shoulds” sometimes contradict each other. I can’t both keep everyone on a set routine and let the routine go to embrace every moment. I can’t enroll them in every activity where they can learn all the skills while simultaneously giving them generous free time in the great outdoors. There is never enough of me or them to go around for that.

One of the hardest realizations as a mom is that no matter how many of the “shoulds” I do, ultimately I do not have control over how my children turn out. God created each of my children to have their own free will to choose which way they will go. I can do all the “shoulds” and say all the “right” things, but they are still their own person with a will which they will use to determine the path they will take. (Plus, I am a far from perfect mother so I know I will never even be able to do and say all the “right” things).

So what is a mom to do?

For me, I am realizing my power is limited, but I have direct access to the One whose power is unlimited.

I am realizing I am an imperfect human bound to make mistakes, but I have direct access to the One who never makes mistakes.

And as I lean into the God who created my children, who has a plan for my children, and who has the power to change hearts, I am realizing there is one powerful tool I should must use to reach the heart of my children.

That tool is prayer.

“…the prayer of a righteous person {aka mom} is powerful and effective.” ~James 5:16 (brackets mine)

Prayer is our direct line from the deepest concerns of our hearts to the heart of our Heavenly Father who loves our children more than we do.

Prayer is what we can do when we feel helpless to help the ones we love the most.

Prayer is both the best defense and the best offense we have as we wage the war for our children’s souls.

Prayer is what we as mothers should do both in times of trouble and in times of happiness.

“Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise.” ~James 5:13

So instead of worrying about all the things I “should” be doing to be a good mom who has kids who turn out “right,” I am taking my children along with all the hopes and dream I have for them, along with all the worries and burdens I carry for them, along with all my own insecurities and feelings of failures straight to the feet of the Heavenly Father who is more than capable of handling every last detail of our lives. He is waiting there for us ready to extend mercy to cover our weakness, ready to grant us grace each step of the way, ready to give us a helping hand in our moments of need.

“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” ~Hebrews 4:16

Over the coming months, I will be sharing from time to time ways we can be praying for our children and ourselves as mothers. It is my hope and prayer for each of you that you will grow in your faith and trust in the goodness of our Heavenly Father as you carry your children to him in prayer.

Let’s begin this prayer journey by surrendering our children to the One who created them and gave them to us.

Heavenly Father, I come to you as a mother who loves her children and wants them to not necessarily turn out “right” by societies standards, but to walk in accordance with your will, to walk in your ways, to live lives pleasing to you no matter what pressure society puts on them or on me. I’ve come to realize the best way for me to help them is to bring them to you and lay them at your feet because you love them, as hard as it is to comprehend, more than I do, and your desire is for them to walk in relationship with you. So today, I am bringing my children to you and trusting you to reach into their hearts. Father, guide me as their mother to do and say the things you would have me to say, not the things someone down the road or someone across the internet says, but to mother them, to nurture and guide them in the way you would have me.

P.S. To make sure you don’t miss the rest of this series on praying for our children, sign up for my email newsletter below, and I’ll let you know when the next one comes out.

Photo by Paige Cody on Unsplash

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